AWG CHIBI OMAKE
by Kamen Rider Chrome
Summary: A compilation of the chibi omake skits at the end of each chapter of AWG Saga Season 06
1. Caught

" **CAUGHT"**

"Easy there, Nagata-san," Aisha said as she supported him. Nagata had sprained his ankle during PE class and she was helping him over to the school's infirmary so Nurse Shion could take a look at him.

"Thanks for helping me," Nagata smiled gratefully and she blushed as she casually shrugged.

"No problem. It's just what friends do for each other. Oh, we're here," Aisha replied. She slid the door open. "Excuse me-!" She froze at the doorway.

"What?" Nagata asked as he looked inside and he gawked. "O...kay."

They caught Iori and Shion in the middle of a passionate make out session. The squinty-eyed boy had his arms wrapped around the school nurse. Shion had the buttons of her blouse undone as their lips were locked in a kiss.

The two parties stared at each other in awkward silence for several seconds before Nagata slid the door close.


	2. Chess Master

" **CHESS MASTER"**

"Checkmate," Mitsuki concluded their 101st chess match.

"Grr...!" Juniku growled. "Rematch, tomorrow!"

"OK," Mitsuki shrugged before he left.

Juniku studied the chessboard with narrowed eyes. She then spent the day practicing by herself, before she practiced against Shibai so she could formulate a new strategy. Finally, the time for their rematch arrived.

"Hah! Checkmate!" Juniku declared victoriously. She crossed her arms and stood proudly as she turned her nose up at him. Mitsuki would realize her superiority! He would grovel at her feet as she gloated how she finally defeated him! It would be sweet! It would be grand! It would be amazing!

Mitsuki then did the unexpected and patted her on the head.

"Congratulations, Keifa. Good game," he said before he left the room. She gaped at him with wide eyes as he left.

"Wait! You're supposed to wallow in defeat as I prove I'm superior to you! This isn't how it's supposed to happen! Get back here, Baron and let me crush you for real! Get back here!" Juniku stomped her feet in frustration.

Riten and Ukin observed as Juniku threw a tantrum.

"That girl's got issues," Ukin commented.

Riten nodded in agreement.


	3. Ren Meets Zweiss

" **REN MEETS ZWEISS"**

Zweiss was a black and white Corgi owned by Nagata Oda. He was a sweet little dog, loyal, playful and absolutely adorable. Zweiss was also a pretty good guard dog. He may not look very tough, but his bite was bad as his bark.

His cute appearance got everyone to underestimate him, and those who did not see the danger of provoking the demon within paid an awful price.

But enough of the dark and grim topics. Right now, Zweiss was heading to Nagata's school. Apparently, Nagata had forgotten his lunch. So, carrying Nagata's bento lunchbox, which was wrapped in a blue handkerchief, Zweiss set off towards Nagata's school to deliver the lunchbox personally.

How a dog could have the intelligence to even know when his master had forgotten their lunch and decided to deliver the lunch instead of eating it himself was a mystery on its own. Still, it was pretty amazing.

Zweiss found Nagata's school. The gate was closed but Zweiss knew how to slip through the bars of the gate. He first put down the lunch and squeezed his tiny body through. Then he grabbed the lunchbox on the other side and pulled it under the gate. It was lucky that there was enough space between the ground and the bottom of the gate.

Zweiss took a moment to admire his master's school, sitting on his butt with his tongue hanging out. He let out a happy bark as he caught his master's scent and picked up the lunchbox to deliver it personally. He entered through the front door of the main building. The door wasn't closed so he managed to get inside. Sniffing the air for his master's scent, Zweiss went looking for him.

Zweiss climbed up the stairs, which was quite a feat for a small dog with short legs. Once Zweiss was at the top of the steps, he looked left and right as he sniffed the air to catch Nagata's scene again. Then he noticed as someone stood in front of him. He looked up with his tongue hanging out of his mouth to see who had found him.

Ren stared down at the little Corgi as Sekito walked over and planted himself by her foot. Sekito and Zweiss looked at each other and began communicating. It came out in barks, but what came out could be translated as this:

 **Sekito** : "What are you doing here?"

 **Zweiss** : "Bringing Master's food. Master forgot food."

 **Sekito** : "Where is your Master?"

 **Zweiss** : "Looking for him now."

Ren spoke quietly, "Cute doggie." She knelt down and picked up Zweiss who did not oppose the attention. Ren brought him closer, allowing Zweiss to lick her face. She read the name on his collar. "Your name is 'Zweiss'?"

Zweiss barked in response.

Sekito barked and brought Ren's attention to the lunchbox. Still holding Zweiss, she picked up the lunchbox and looked at the name on the handkerchief wrapped around the box.

"This is for Nagata?" Ren asked. "OK, I'll take you there."

It was very hot outside and Nagata didn't want to sit outside to have lunch. Instead, he and his friends put their desks together to eat their lunch together in the classroom. As Nagata opened his bag to grab the lunch he packed, he discovered that he couldn't find his lunchbox.

"What's wrong, Nagata-san?" Aisha asked.

"I think I forgot my lunch. Guess I have to either go hungry or go buy bread," he answered.

"Or you could share our lunches," Sei offered.

Nagata looked at the menma she had covering her rice and grimaced. Menma was okay in small portions, but her lunch was practically mostly menma.

"I wouldn't mind sharing some of mine," added Aisha.

"Me neither!" spoke up Sui.

"Nah, it's fine. Maybe I can get some leftovers or something," Nagata politely declined.

The door of the classroom opened and Ren stepped inside. Nagata looked over and his eyes widened as he saw what Ren was holding.

"Zweiss!?" Nagata exclaimed in disbelief.

Zweiss jumped out of Ren's arms and ran towards Nagata. In an impressive show of agility and acrobatics, Zweiss jumped from desk to desk before landing on Nagata's desk. The Corgi began to rapidly lick Nagata's face as he tried to fend off the Corgi's affectionate assault.

"Zweiss, quit it!" Nagata laughed. Zweiss' tongue was tickling him.

"Nagata," said Ren softly as she showed him the lunchbox.

"Hey, that's my lunchbox," said Nagata once he managed to calm Zweiss down.

"Your dog brought it here," Ren answered.

"Really?" Sui blinked.

"Smart dog," Sei complimented.

"Yeah, he really is," Nagata agreed. "But Zweiss, you're in a lot of trouble. You know you're not supposed to wander off on your own."

Zweiss cutely gazed back and tilted his head to the side with his tongue hanging out.

"Oh, I can't stay mad at that face," Nagata cooed as he hugged Zweiss. He said to Ren, "Thanks for bringing Zweiss over with my lunch, Ren."

"No problem," she answered.

"Do you want to sit with us?" Nagata asked.

"OK."

Joined by Ren, Zweiss and Sekito, the group of friends had lunch. Ren seemed content to share some of her food with the two dogs. She couldn't resist such cute little creatures.


	4. Hitting High Notes

" **HITTING HIGH NOTES"**

Marcus was watching the Chou Sister in the middle of rehearsal. However, he was unsatisfied with their performance.

" _Non, non, non._ This song requires you to hit very high notes!" Marcus smacked on the lyrics he was holding.

"I'm sorry, Marcus-kun. But that's as high as we can go," Chokaku apologized.

Marcus rubbed his chin and then he got an idea.

"Just relax," said Shibai as she held up her acupuncture needles as the Chou Sisters cowered in the corner. The girls screamed as the scary woman approached them threateningly.

" _Magnifique! Bravo! Bravo!_ " Marcus applauded.


	5. Weapons Shopping

" **WEAPONS SHOPPING"**

The To group was eating lunch at a restaurant when Kenshin decided to mention something.

"Hey, Hideyoshi. Have you ever thought of getting yourself a weapon to carry on you?" Kenshin questioned.

Hideyoshi blinked and asked, "What brought this up?"

"Well, Miyabi and I were talking and since you're supposed to be Yue-chan's bodyguard, you should look the part," Kenshin said.

"It's true," Kayu agreed.

"Look the part?" Hideyoshi cocked an eyebrow.

"Without your armor, you don't exactly look like threatening enough to be a bodyguard," stated Kayu bluntly.

"So we thought you should get yourself a weapon," Kenshin added.

"I can protect Yue-hime just fine," Hideyoshi defended. "Besides, I don't think our group needs more people who are obviously armed. And as you know, my brain is my weapon."

"Yeah, you can always _think_ them to death," Kenshin mocked and Hideyoshi glared.

"We just need to pick something you can use to defend yourself," Kayu added diplomatically.

"I saw a shop selling weapons in town. We can browse around a bit there," Kenshin urged.

"Alright, if it will shut you up, I'll buy a weapon," Hideyoshi conceded.

The group entered the weapons store and browsed for a bit. Kayu was looking at the spears they had for sale and examined them. She shrugged as she put one back on the display rack. None of these weapons were as refined as her halberd.

"Try these out," Kenshin recommended as he tossed Hideyoshi a pair of nunchucks.

"Nunchucks?" Hideyoshi cocked an eyebrow. "You sure about this?" He twirled the nunchucks in his hands.

"We gotta start somewhere," shrugged Kenshin.

Hideyoshi tried out the nunchucks, swinging them around.

"OW!" Hideyoshi yelped. Kayu heard the yell coming from Hideyoshi who was nursing a goose egg growing on his head. He had tried the nunchucks and hit himself in the head.

"Not your thing?" Kenshin asked.

"No." Hideyoshi returned the nunchucks. "I think I should try something else."

"Yeah, I guess s too," Kenshin agreed. OK, Hideyoshi and nunchucks did not mix well.

"I found something that might work," Kayu called and Hideyoshi rubbed his head as she held up a pair of chui (Chinese maces). "Here, these should suit your fighting style."

"OK," Hideyoshi said as he held his hands open and Kayu handed them over. Immediately, he felt the weight pull him to the floor as he yelped. He then dropped them on his feet and cried out before he collapsed, holding his now sore feet. "Ow! Ow! Ow!"

"Are they really that heavy?" Kayu asked.

"Yes!" cried out Hideyoshi as he released his feet and picked himself up. His toes were throbbing but were fortunately not broken.

"I've seen you carry a hammer and that spiked chui in battle," Kayu reminded.

" _In my armor_. That suit boosts my upper body strength. Without it, I'm pretty weak," Hideyoshi said.

"Here, let me get them," said Kenshin as he easily lifted the chui. "Hm, they don't feel so heavy. In fact, I could use these for weightlifting." He demonstrated as Hideyoshi grumbled and glared at his friend before he continued browsing.

"He really should consider working out more," remarked Kayu.

"Well, he spends most of his time with books and an abacus. He's always been a nerd," Kenshin said honestly.

"Really?" Kayu asked.

"Yeah, bullies used to pick on him a lot but I was always there to make sure they didn't," Kenshin recalled. He would always protect his friend and in exchange, Hideyoshi would help him with his homework and studies. Of course, they bullied Hideyoshi for also being a bit of a braggart.

"So, should we get them?" Kayu asked.

"Let's see their price and see if we should," said Kenshin.

"You're right. Weapons can get pretty expensive," Kayu agreed.

"I know. I mean, I had to pay the blacksmith a lot to make my spear," Kenshin replied. Custom weapons fetched a much higher price.

"You know, if we're getting Hideyoshi a weapon, we might as well get something for Yue-sama so she can defend herself," Kayu remarked.

Kenshin snapped his fingers and grinned. "Oh! I got it! I saw something awesome!" Kenshin took Totaku's hand. "Come on, Yue-sama!" He then dragged her along to where he found the awesome thing.

"Should I be concerned?" Kaku asked Hideyoshi when he came back and saw Kenshin take Totaku away.

"Kenshin doesn't always think before he acts if you recall. We should see what he has in mind for Yue-hime," Hideyoshi answered.

They didn't have to search far as they found the two of them at another aisle in the store.

"Whaddya guys think?" Kenshin asked as he showed off Totaku dressed in an elaborate suit of armor. It was bulky, added a few feet to her height and looked like it could take several hits. It was also intimidating, contrasting with Totaku's appearance. The only part that was exposed was her face.

"Yue-sama, are you okay in there?" Kaku asked.

"I can't move," Totaku said as she struggled in it. The armor was so heavy that she could barely move her arms.

"You just need to build up your strength," said Kenshin as he slapped Totaku's back. This caused the suit of armor to topple over and Totaku to fall face down on the shop's floor. "Oops!"

"Are you OK, Yue-hime?" Hideyoshi asked.

"Just get me out of this thing!" yelled Totaku, only it came out muffled.


	6. The League of Little Lolis

" **THE LEAGUE OF LITTLE LOLIS"**

"I call to order this meeting of the League of Little Lolis!" Sonshoko announced.

"Our first order of business should be to change the damn name," grumbled Juniku.

"The name stays!" Sonshoko objected. "Now, can anyone tell me what our league is all about?"

"To show even small boobs are good," Hoto said as she raised her hand up.

"And we're great even if we don't get boobs," added Chinkyuu as she raised her fist.

"And that even little girls like us can be good lovers," Komei said as she also raised her hand.

"Exactly!" Sonshoko nodded. "For too long we have been overshadowed by big boobs! I mean just look at them!" She pointed on the blackboard which had pictures of all the girls with big breasts posted on it. "How can we compete with that?"

"By being cute!" Hoto chirped.

"By being adorable!" Chinkyuu proclaimed.

"By being _moe_!" Komei suggested.

"Exactly! If we can't win with sex appeal, we'll win with cute appeal!" announced Sonshoko. "Now onwards, League of Little Lolis! Let's show everyone that the Little Sister Appeal can still work!"

"YEAH!"

"What have I gotten myself into?" Juniku mumbled.

And so began the Anti-Boob Revolution.

"DOWN WITH BIG BOOBS!"

"BIG BOOBS ARE GREAT!"

"DOWN WITH BIG BOOBS!"

"BIG BOOBS ARE GREAT!"

The Little Loli League met fierce opposition from the Nanban Barbarians who supported and love big breasts. Nagata stood on the sidelines with Ichiro.

"What the hell is happening?" Nagata asked.

Ichiro could only shrug helplessly.

"DOWN WITH BIG BOOBS!"

"BIG BOOBS ARE GREAT!"

"DOWN WITH BIG BOOBS!"

"BIG BOOBS ARE GREAT!"

"You know what? I'm just going not interfere and let this all play out. You want to go get something to drink?" Nagata asked.

"Sure," Ichiro accepted.

"DOWN WITH BIG BOOBS!"

"BIG BOOBS ARE GREAT!"

"DOWN WITH BIG BOOBS!"

"BIG BOOBS ARE GREAT!"


	7. Trick or Treat

" **TRICK OR TREAT"**

Rinrin, Riri, Shuri, Nenene and Hinari were out Trick-or-Treating.

Rinrin rang the doorbell and the door opened.

"Trick-or-Treat!"

Suddenly, a Tiki Mask Monster jumped out and bellowed, "OOGA BOOGA BOOGA!"

The girls screamed and ran away, leaving their bags of candy behind.

Later, the girls returned.

"Trick-or-Treat!"

"OOGA BOOGA BOO-"

 **POW!**

The Tiki Mask Monster was knocked out by a punch. The mask broke in half, revealing a knocked out Kenshin.

Haru gasped. "It wasn't a Tiki Mask Monster at all! It was Kenshin all along!"

Kenshin groaned as the girl grabbed their loot (candy) and skipped away to continue took a moment to kick Kenshin in the gut before she followed her friends.


	8. Movie Night

" **MOVIE NIGHT"**

Mitsuki was watching ' **The Ring HD 3D** ' in the living room with Karin, Shuran, Shunran, Keifa, Nagi, Mao, and Sawa. They were sitting on the floor instead of the couch due to space restrictions. They even turned off all the lights to provide a spooky atmosphere.

"The idea of a cursed videotape is ludicrous," Keifa commented.

"It's not supposed to make sense, Keifa. It's a horror movie," Mitsuki argued.

"And movies would suck if they were realistic," remarked Mao.

Keifa replied, "I know, but it's a VHS tape. Besides, why keep the curse going? Why not just stop spreading it around?"

"People are just selfish like that," Mitsuki stated.

"You mean like that movie 'It Follows'?" Keifa asked.

Karin shushed them, "Do you both mind? We're trying to watch the movie."

"Look!" Sawa pointed as Sadako crawled out of the well. She then shambled towards the audience as they leaned back. The figure seemed to crawl out of the TV. In fact, the figure of Sadako was crawling out of _their_ TV.

"Mitsuki, where did you get this movie?" Karin asked as the figure was slowly coming out of the screen as if it was made of water.

"A creepy video store," he answered, eyes wide.

"Oh. RUN!"

Once Sadako was out of the TV, she stood up then pulled her hair back only to see an empty living room. She blinked in confusion then moaned sadly.

" _I just wanted to watch TV with you all...Why do they always run away...?"_


	9. Haunted House

" **HAUNTED HOUSE"**

Nagata, Rinrin, and Aisha stood in front of the Haunted House the school had set up. It really looked like the real thing, frightening with all the visual and sound effects thrown in to make it as authentic as possible.

The two girls shivered in fright as they clung onto his arms.

"Come on, girls!" Nagata encouraged as he took the girls inside.

They saw ghosts, monsters, and ghouls jump out to scare them, causing the girls to scream in fright at the sight of them. The creepy atmosphere just added to the suspense and while Nagata screamed with them, he felt exhilarated.

And then...at the very end...

"Ugh...ugh...aah...aah..."

"What is _that_?" Aisha asked as she clung tightly to Nagata's right arm.

"Ooh~ aah~"

"Nagata-niichan, what is that!?" Rinrin cried as she hid behind him.

And then the three of them heard a loud feminine scream.

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

Aisha and Rinrin screamed as they grabbed Nagata and ran out of the Haunted House with him.

Shortly afterward, Iori and Shion stepped out from behind a wall, fixing their clothes.

"Did you hear something?" Iori asked his secret lover.

"No. Anyway, let's go and pick up Riri from school. She'd want to have fun here with us," Shion suggested.

"Yes, she would like that. By the way, you almost forgot your bra."

"Oh, thank you."

"And your panties."

"Really? I almost forgot about those."


	10. Advice from Sempai

" **ADVICE FROM SEMPAI"**

"You know, if you wanted to lay in bed with him, I won't tell," Shibai said bluntly to Komei.

"What!?" Komei yelped.

"It's obvious you have feelings for your lord. Why not just slip into his bed and lay next to him?"

"I can't do that! It wouldn't be proper! I would be taking advantage of him!"

"Good Heavens, Komei! It's not like I'm asking you to strip him naked! I'm just saying to take advantage of the situation."

Komei looked uncertain but glanced towards Nagata who was lying unconscious in bed.

"Fine, I guess it wouldn't hurt to try," sighed Komei. She went and pulled back the blanket when she just blinked at what she found. "Ren?"

Ryofu was lying on top of Nagata. "Yes?"

"What are you doing?"

"Guarding Nagata-sama."

"OK."

Komei pulled the blanket back over them as Shibai snickered.

"Oh, the look on your face!" laughed Shibai as Komei went red.


	11. Afterlife Movie Night

" **AFTERLIFE MOVIE NIGHT"**

Chosen was sitting in a movie theater with a tub of popcorn.

"Sorry we're late," Ruby apologized as she took the seat to his right.

"The line at the concession stand was long," added Ranmaru apologetically as she took the seat to his left.

"Plus Ruby wanted all the strawberry candy," Nagato stated as he sat next to his wife.

"It's alright. The movie hasn't started yet," Chosen smiled.

"So, what exactly are we watching again?" Ruby asked.

"Oh, we're just going to see your son kick reptilian ass."

"Cool! This is going to be so awesome! I can't wait!" Ruby pumped her fists.

"Ruby, calm down," Nagato chided. "Save your excitement for the movie."

"Ah, to see Oyakata-sama's descendant in action. Now that is something truly worth watching," smiled Ranmaru blissfully.

"Put on your 3D glasses. It's starting," Chosen instructed.

 **"ROMANCE IN THE SHOKU KINGDOM"**

 **"HUNT FOR THE HEISEI RIDER LOCKSEEDS!"**

 **"SANGOKUDEN ARMORED WAR GODS SAGA THE MOVIE: PAST AND PRESENT, ALL HEARTS UNITED!"**

"WOW! THIS IS AWESOME!" exclaimed Ruby.

"It's just the previews, Ruby," Nagato pointed out.

"Hey, keep it down in front!" yelled a voice and Ruby stood up to look behind her. She gasped. Sitting in the seats behind them were Maga, Kademu, Sorisa and Moriya.

"What are you monsters doing here!?" Ranmaru demanded.

"We're on our Hell Break and we thought it would be nice to do something together," said Moriya.

"Actually, we don't have a choice. We're shackled together," Kademu added.

"But we still get to see Braco get his ass handed to him, so it's not so bad," Sorisa said.

"We need more snacks," whined Maga.

"We got plenty! So pipe down!" yelled Moriya.

"Well...enjoy the movie...I guess," Ruby awkwardly replied and sat down. "Hell gives breaks?" she whispered.

"I don't think so," Nagato responded, unsure.

"They probably just snuck out," Chosen whispered back. "Oh, and now the real show is about to begin."

"I bet Naga-chan will be awesome," Ruby said confidently.

"I wager he will perform majestically," added Ranmaru.

"And he'll get the girls," nodded Nagato. "All of the girls."

"We just have to wait and see, won't we?" smiled Chosen mysteriously as he saw the title that was onscreen:

" **AZURE ASCENSION"**

" _Nagata-sama!"_

" _Nagata!"_

" _Nagata-niichan!"_

"Everyone...everyone's calling for me..." realized Nagata as the glow around him grew brighter.

"Then go to them," Ruby's spirit told him.

"Guys!" he shouted as blue lightning burst around him.

Back in the real world, the Kachidoki Lockseed in Nagata's Sengoku Driver glowed. The orange glow enveloped the unconscious young man before it flew away, leaving an empty bed.

Meanwhile, outside, the Shoku Warriors were facing against Braco. They were marred by their injuries, but they still stood their ground. While Nagata was out of commission, it was up to them to protect Touka Village and the Kingdom of Shoku.

Braco gathered up energy into his hand before he threw the Rinki sphere at them. Suddenly, an orange sphere intercepted the purple energy sphere and shattered it. The orange sphere then vanished to reveal none other than Nagata.

He was alive and back in action.

The Shoku Warriors gasped in shock, but were overjoyed to see their precious Blue King back on his feet. They ran towards him, gathering around him as they wept tears of joy.

"Naga-kun, you're alive!" Karasu exclaimed joyfully as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Nagata-niichan, huwaaaaa~!" Chouhi cried as she hugged her big brother tightly.

"Nagata-sama," Kanu said who also cried tears of joy as she saw her beloved.

"Nagata-sama, you're alive," Ryuubi spoke softly.

"I heard you hearts call out to me," Nagata said. It was thanks to his mother's spirit that he could hear their hearts calling out to him. He couldn't be anymore happier.

Chosen stood in the distance, awestruck by this. He then smiled in approval. "So, looks like he created his own miracle."

Braco hissed, "So, you're alive."

Nagata saw Braco and walked towards him, stopping only a few feet away. Blue lightning flashed from his chest before something came out. Nagata took hold of the object and activated it.

" **LOCK OPEN!"**

A bright light enveloped him as a result before revealing his Rider form. However, the radiance surrounding him prevented anyone from seeing his new form clearly.

" **RYUJIN ARMS!"**

Chosen's eyes widened as he shouted at the sight of the phenomenon, "NOW IT'S A SUPER MIRACLE!"

Braco fired a concentrated sphere of Rinki at Gaim, but he casually smacked it away.

" **MUSOU SABER! HINAWA DAIDAI DJ JU! DAIDAIMARU!"**

The weapon he summoned was the DJ Gun Sojinto Mode.

"I'll protect my friends, my family, and everyone in this land!" Gaim swore loudly as he swung his weapon.

" **SOIYA! RYUJIN SPARKING!"**

He swung vertically and horizontally, sending a giant cross of crackling blue energy flying towards Braco. He was engulfed by it and destroyed instantly.

 _*Special thanks to Bloodyredrose1994 for the above 'preview' clip._


	12. After the Show

" **AFTER THE SHOW"**

"Thank you and goodnight!" The Four Sovereigns bowed before they went backstage.

"That was _magnifique_ , _mes amis_ ," Marcus smiled.

"That was actually pretty fun," admitted Nagata.

"Most enjoyable, if I do say so myself," agreed Masataka.

"It was OK," Mitsuki shrugged.

"I've never had so many girls screaming for me before," Hideyoshi blushed.

"I actually see you boys making it big in show business!" Marcus grinned. "I'm talking merchandising, promotional events, the whole works!"

"Actually, I don't think I'll have time for that," said Nagata. "I got some maids to do-I mean paperwork to do. Yes, paperwork."

"I have my own duties to return to. They take up most of my time anyway," added Masataka.

"Gotta train the Crimson Guard. It's a full-time gig," Mitsuki continued.

"And I have a few things keeping me busy as well," Hideyoshi finished.

"Oh, alright then," sighed Marcus. The Four Sovereigns walked away. Chokaku patted his back. "They have so much talent and it's going to waste."

"It's alright, Marcus-kun. You still got us," Chokaku said optimistically.

" _Merci_ , Tenho-chan."

"Hey, there's like a pink thong on stage. Does anyone know who it belongs to?" Choho asked. "Because I'm not touching it."

"I'm sorry! That's mine!" Chosen apologized as he picked up his thong and vanished.

The Chou Sisters and Marcus shivered.

"That never happened," Marcus stated.

"Agreed," the Chou Sisters chorused.


	13. Before the Show

" **BEFORE THE SHOW"**

Chokaku, Choho, and Choryo were in the middle of dance rehearsal as Marcus observed them. However, Chokaku seemed to miss her timing with her steps, forcing Marcus to stop their practice.

"Alright, stop!" Marcus ordered.

Chokaku whimpered. She knew she had messed up.

"Tenho-chan, you know I love you. But kick-step, kick-step, body-roll is not complicated. It's kick-step, kick-step, body-roll!" Marcus scolded.

"I'm sorry!" Chokaku apologized.

Choho yelled in frustration, "Argh! I can't work like this!" She started to storm off.

"Hold on! Where do you think you're going?" Marcus demanded.

"Anywhere but here!" Choho shouted back.

"No, you're not! You still have a fitting to get to! You haven't lost that weight, have you?" Marcus accused.

"You don't know that!" Choho snapped defensively.

"I know there's an empty box of snacks hiding under your bed!" Marcus countered.

Choho started to whimper, and Choryo suddenly broke down and cried because of all the pressure.

Ukin and Mitsuki were spying on them from outside the studio.

"So, being an idol isn't so easy," Ukin remarked.

"Never thought he could be such a slave driver," Mitsuki commented.

 _*Based on a_ _ **RWBY Chibi**_ _Dance Practice short._


	14. Brusa Li's Wisdom

" **BRUSA LI'S WISDOM"**

"Brusa-sennin! Brusa-sennin!" Kada yelled cheerfully as he ran towards the sage. He slid in front of him before kneeling down before him. "The techniques you have taught me, and your guiding wisdom, have been a huge boon to me! Please, teach me more of your wisdom!"

" _If you look to the stars, you will see the butt of cats as they rain down from the Heavens_ ," Brusa Li spoke.

"...I'm sorry, what?" Kada was confused.

" _If you look through a hole in the wall, you will see your future bride, or you may see an early grave_."

"...Uh-huh," Kada nodded.

" _Fighting is foolish, food-fighting is wasteful, but an eating contest is even more wasteful as you waste the food by expelling it from your mouth. Still, it is very fun to watch._ "

There was a pause from Kada before he spoke again.

"...Brusa-sennin, have you been inhaling the herbs again?"

"Where am I? Who are you? Where's my soup?" Brusa Li asked in confusion.

Kada facepalmed and sighed.

 **Remember kids, only dopes takes dope!**

 **Don't do drugs! EVER!**

 **This has been an Anti-Drug Message from yours truly.**

 _*Now this omake was inspired by Emgo's Transformers Review Skits, specifically the ones with '_ _ **Titans Return Alpha Trion**_ _'._


	15. Eating Contest

" **EATING CONTEST"**

"Alright, everyone! Let's begin today's eating contest! As usual, we have Chouhi, Bacho, and Ryofu!" Batai said as she introduced the competitors. "And we have a new contender: Nanamomo!"

Chouhi, Bacho, Ryofu and Nanamomo sat down at the table.

"And today they will each attempt to finish 100 fried rice balls!" Batai announced.

The plates of fried rice balls were served up, the food items piled up high in front of each of them.

"And go!" Batai announced.

"Done," Nanamomo revealed her empty plate. The other competitors gawked at her. The contest had just started and she was already finished? How was that possible?

"Wait, what? How!?" Bacho exclaimed.

"So fast!" Chouhi was amazed.

"Looks like we have a winner! It's Nanamomo!" declared Batai.

"Congratulations." Ryofu shook Nanamomo's hand.

"Thank you," Nanamomo accepted.


	16. Growing Arsenal

" **GROWING ARSENAL"**

Nagata was standing in his office with the Sengoku Driver on. With him was Iori and on his desk was a collection of different Lockseeds.

"Hey, Iori. Are you sure about this?" asked Nagata.

"Not 100 percent sure but your Ryujin Arms, from what we have seen, allows you to summon the weapons of the Arms you've ever accessed. So, I theorize that if you access other Arms, their weapons will be added to your Ryujin Arms' arsenal," Iori answered.

"Well, I guess there's no harm in trying new things, right?" Nagata grinned as he began to try out different Lockseeds, starting with Iori's own personal set.

 **[BUDOU ARMS! RYU, HOU, HA-HA-HA!]**

Gaim was in Budou Arms, which looked odd on him since the purple armor slightly clashed with his blue bodysuit. He twirled the Budou Ryuhou around.

"I've never been much of a gunman, but I have to say this looks good on me," Gaim remarked.

"Alright, next," Iori prompted.

 **[KIWI ARMS! GEKI, RIN, SEI-YA HA!]**

Gaim was clad in Kiwi Arms and holding the Kiwi Gekirin. He did a few practice swings, getting used to the weapons.

"Not bad. I can see why you like these things," stated Gaim.

 **[PITAYA ARMS! RYUJIN, HOU! HOH! HOH! HOH!]**

Gaim stumbled a bit as the Pitaya Ryujin Hou appeared in his hands. He regained his balance as he held the heavy cannon.

"Man, Iori. How do you fight with this thing?" Gaim asked.

"I only use it for long ranged combat. It's worthless in close combat," answered Iori.

"Yeah, I can see why."

 **[MATSUBOKKURI ARMS! ICHIGEKI IN THE SHADOW!]**

As Matsubokkuri Lockseeds were C-Class Lockseeds, they were pretty common. While low amongst the ranking of most Lockseeds, they did provide armor. Gaim now stood in the same armor as Kurokage's default form and wielding the Kagematsu. While it appeared sturdy, the armor was pretty light.

"You could probably use the spear as a throwing weapon," suggested Iori.

"That's true," agreed Gaim.

 **[DONGURI ARMS! NEVER GIVE UP!]**

Brown on blue didn't look so good but Gaim tried the Donguri Arms and swung the Donkachi for a bit. He could get used to this.

"Not bad, for a small mallet," Gaim commented.

Nagata continued to go through the Lockseeds Iori had brought for him.

 **[KURUMI ARMS! MISTER KNUCKLEMAN!]**

"My mom would definitely like this one," said Gaim as he did a few practice punches.

"Is she a boxer?" Iori asked.

"I think she used to do it during high school," Gaim answered.

 **[BANANA ARMS! KNIGHT OF SPEAR!]**

"If I ever go to rescue princesses, I know what I'm wearing," Gaim quipped.

"And that's all of them," Iori noted as Nagata finished going through every single Lockseed.

"Seriously, how come we've got so many Lockseeds?" asked Nagata.

"The usual way. I go into Helheim every so often to practice my marksmanship and pick up some Lockseeds while I'm there. It's just luck that I found a few that could be useful." There were a lot of Himawari Lockseeds among the ones he collected but they could prove useful some other time.


	17. How Not to Purge

" **HOW** **NOT** **TO PURGE"**

The school was in chaos. The Purge was in effect, and until the final bell rang, the students and teachers could all kill each other. Already, there had been many fatalities. Fortunately, a group of friends had taken shelter in a classroom and were boarding up the doors to prevent anyone from coming inside.

The group consisted of Yue, Ei, Miyabi, Hideyoshi, Ren, and Kenshin.

"OK," Hideyoshi said as he hammered in the last nail. "That should keep those maniacs away."

"Ei-chan, don't you think that machete is a bit much?" Yue asked her friend uncertainly.

"I just saw a kid wipe out the entire Kendo Club with a fucking chainsaw. I'm not taking any chances," Ei defended.

"Well, in two hours, this will all be over," Hideyoshi said as he checked his watch. "Whose idea was it to have an annual Purge anyway?"

"The Headmaster," Ren deadpanned.

"Ah, that makes sense. Think he's related to Monokuma?"

Kenshin stood up and paced back and forth. "Guys, you guys, I just realized something. It's the motherfucking Purge! We can do whatever we want!"

Ei didn't like where this was going. "Oh no, Kenshin. Please, don't you go crazy! I don't want to have to kill you! Please don't give me a reason!"

Kenshin neared Ei threateningly as she trembled in fear while everyone else watched.

"Ei...I'm going to eat your lunch!" Kenshin declared as he opened up Ei's bento lunch box and began scooping her lunch into his mouth.

"Wait, what?" Ei blinked.

" **Purge** , baby!" Kenshin tossed the empty lunch box away. "See? I just littered!"

"OK, first of all, eating Ei's lunch isn't illegal. Neither is littering," Hideyoshi pointed out.

"Technically, it's OK," Miyabi added.

"Speak for yourself," Ei mumbled. "You'll still get fined for it."

"And now I'm smoking!" Kenshin boasted as he lit a cigarette.

"Kenshin-kun, maybe you should sit and calm down," Yue suggested.

"I don't have to listen to you! I'm smoking cigarettes!" Kenshin blew smoke in her face, and she coughed.

"OK, now that's just rude!" Hideyoshi snapped as he gently patted Yue's back.

"It's **THE PURGE** , buddy! Get with the program! I can do whatever I want, and nobody can stop or judge me!" declared Kenshin.

"We can still totally judge you," said Miyabi.

"And stop you if we wanted to," Hideyoshi said.

"Oh yeah? Well, I'm going to _fuck_ this cantaloupe!" Kenshin decided.

"Wait, what!? No! No, no, no!" Hideyoshi protested.

"I'm gonna fuck a melon!" Kenshin shouted back.

"Don't you fuck it!" Ei objected.

"I'm gonna do it!"

"Don't you do it!" Hideyoshi and Ei screamed.

"Please, Kenshin-kun! Please don't do it!" Yue begged as she covered her eyes.

Kenshin was carving a hole in the melon with his knife.

"I'm gonna carve a nice hole for my dick!"

"It's not illegal, but it's still horrifying!" Miyabi screamed.

"Just don't spit in it!" Hideyoshi advised in a panic, but Kenshin ignored him and did it anyway, even flicking his tongue around the hole he made. "Oh, God!"

"I'm going to cut your dick off!" Ei threatened as she brandished her machete. "I WILL CUT IT OFF!"

"This melon is about to fucked by yours truly!" Kenshin pulled down his pants.

Ren had enough. She got behind Kenshin and snapped his neck. He fell forward, with his pants down, and the melon crushed under him.

"Oh, thank you, Ren," said Hideyoshi in relief.

"He was getting annoying," said Ren.

* **Based on a CollegeHumor Skit**


	18. Interviews

" **INTERVIEWS"**

"Once more my least favorite part of the job is...recruitment interviews..." Mitsuki groaned.

"It can't be that bad, can it?" Shibai asked.

"A lot of people want to join the Crimson Guard because of Baron-sama's fame. They also think it will enable them to woo girls," said Gakushin.

"What would give them that idea?" Mitsuki questioned.

Gakushin and Shibai cocked an eyebrow at him. Did he seriously just ask _that_?

The door opened and Ukin came in to report, "Baron-sama, everyone, the applicants have all arrived."

"Alright, let's just get this thing over with," Mitsuki began.

They interviewed the first applicant.

Mitsuki started, "So, you want to join the Crimson Guard?"

"YEAH!"

Gakushin questioned, "Any special skills?"

"YEAH!"

Shibai inquired, "Would you please describe them?"

"YEAH!"

Irritated, Mitsuki asked, "Is yelling the only thing you're good at!?"

" **YEAH!"**

"Next!"

"No, you don't have to demonstrate sword swallowing right now!"

"Next!"

"We don't need you juggling knives!"

"Next!"

"No, this is not the place where you ask to join the Yellow Turbans! That's not even scheduled for today!"

"Next!"

"So, my girlfriend says that she won't marry me unless I show her how manly I am. That's why I want to join the Crimson Guard," applicant #23 claimed.

"Thank you for giving us your life story," Mitsuki remarked as both Gakushin and Shibai looked bored. "So, tell me, what is it that you can contribute as part of the Crimson Guard?"

Applicant #23 stood up and demonstrated his kung fu. However, to an expert fighter like Gakushin and an experienced warrior like Mitsuki, it just looked like a man yelling and flailing his arms and legs in an attempt to punch and kick.

"Alright, you may stop now," said Shibai. "You may go now."

"Does this mean I got the job?" Applicant #23 asked hopefully.

"Don't call us, we'll call you. Next!" Mitsuki said.

"23 applicants and we still haven't gotten any potential recruits," groaned Gakushin.

"Is it usually this bad?" asked Shibai.

"Believe me, it's not easy to find potential members with all these freaks applying, and this can take a long time," said Mitsuki as he emptied his cup of tea. He wished he had wine to get the edge off. "So, how many do we still have left?"

"That was our 23rd applicant so we still have 145 more to go just for today." Gakushin looked at the list as she crossed out their latest applicant.

Mitsuki banged his forehead on the table.

This was going to be a long day.


	19. Merry Christmas in Shoku

" **MERRY CHRISTMAS IN SHOKU"**

"Have you noticed that Nagata-sama and Iori-sama have been acting odd lately?" Kanu asked Ryuubi.

"Now that you mentioned it, I saw him the other day speaking with the maids. When I approached them, they immediately went silent and Nagata-sama made an excuse that he needed to leave," Ryuubi recalled.

"This sounds suspicious," Gien frowned.

"Enya-chan, I'm sure Nagata-sama has his reasons," Ryuubi defended.

"But it still sounds suspicious," insisted Gien.

A maid then approached them. "Kanu-sama, Gien-sama, Ryuubi-sama, you have been summoned to the throne room."

* * *

The officers of the Shoku Faction were gathered in front of the throne room's doors. The doors opened to let them inside and their eyes widened as they saw a banner hanging from the ceiling.

"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Iori and Nagata cheered. The girls were shocked and confused.

"Christmas?" echoed Ryuubi and Kanu.

"Come inside. We're having a party for you girls," Nagata invited. The throne room had been decorated and there was a table covered with food and drinks.

"Nagata-sama, what is all this?" Kanu asked.

"It's a holiday from our homeworld," Nagata answered.

"Once a year, we come together with friends and family to celebrate Christmas. It's a day to celebrate peace and show generosity towards each other," Iori explained.

"Speaking of which..." Nagata went over to the pile of presents and took a couple of boxes which he handed over to Ryuubi and Kanu. "These are for you."

Kanu opened her box and she saw a beautiful pair of jade earrings. Ryuubi's box contained paper talismans, but these were the special musical paper talismans which contained the Chou Sisters' songs. It was an entire collection.

"Nagata-sama, these are lovely!" gasped Kanu.

"And these are all the Chou Sisters' songs!" Ryuubi exclaimed.

"Merry Christmas, girls," Nagata winked.

"This is for you." Iori held a box to Kochu and she opened it to reveal a beautiful necklace. He also gave Riri a new doll which she loved.

The other girls received presents as well. Batai got a new pair of ornamental daggers, Bacho received a cool good luck charm, Chouhi received a miniature tiger figurine, Komei received a new book and Gien herself received a dakimakura with Ryuubi's image on it.

"It's so you can hold her as you sleep," Iori whispered to Gien cheekily as the two-toned haired girl blushed in embarrassment but she loved the gift nonetheless.

Ryofu and Chinkyuu weren't excluded either as they also received their own gifts. Ryofu received a new brush she could use to brush her pet's fur. Chinkyuu received a new coat since hers was looking rather worn out.

"Merry Christmas, Kara-chan," Nagata said as he gave her a new scabbard.

"Oh, Naga-kun," Karasu smiled as she accepted the brand new scabbard for her sword. "This is so sweet. Thank you."

"Well, your old scabbard just seems to need replacing," he replied.

Smiling happily, she kissed her cousin on the cheek.

* * *

Iori and Nagata both watched the snow fall as they stood on the balcony. They had done a lot of preparations and spent a lot of money on those gifts. They even gave the soldiers a bonus in their salary.

"How does it feel?" Iori asked.

"Worth it," smiled Nagata.

"It does feel good to give back to our friends after everything they've done for us," grinned Iori.

"It sure does. We should do this next year too," Nagata suggested.

"Let's make it a tradition. Now, let's go back in. The party is still going on."


	20. Redeco

" **REDECO"**

"Hey, Iori," started Nagata.

"Yes, Nagata?" Iori replied.

"I saw your new Ryugen-Yomi form. Really cool, but just one point of criticism."

"What's that?"

"It's just a red redeco of your Budou Arms with your Kiwi Arms' helmet."

"It is!?" Iori gasped.

"Wait, you seriously don't know what it looks like?" Nagata asked.

"It's not like I transform to admire myself in the mirror," Iori remarked. "I mean, who does that, am I right?"

"...Right...Who transforms just to look at themselves in the mirror?" Nagata agreed as he chuckled awkwardly.

 **Earlier...**

Ryujin Gaim was standing in front of a full-length mirror, posing.

"Ah, yeah! Now this has got to be the best Final Form design ever! Even has a sweet longcoat!" Ryujin Gaim admired himself as he flexed his muscles. "I look so awesome! I am the _Musou Seiryuoh!_ "


	21. Ryuubi Pregnant?

" **RYUUBI...PREGNANT?"**

Everyone was present at the dinner table, except Ryuubi.

"Did Aneue really say she didn't want dinner?" Kanu asked.

"Yes, that's what she said," Kochu confirmed. "Such a shame too. Nagata-sama and I prepared such a fabulous spread."

"Yeah, she's missing out on a delicious meal," Nagata added in agreement.

"Did she say why she didn't want any dinner?" Iori asked.

"Maybe Touka-neechan has a tummy ache," Riri suggested, worried.

Kanu recounted her sworn sister's recently odd behavior, "She was sighing, with her hands on her stomach. I asked her about it, but she told me not to worry."

"Maybe she does have a stomachache and doesn't want to bother us," suggested Nagata.

"I did ask her if she wanted me to make her any medicine, but she told me she wasn't sick," added Komei, also worried.

"I can't imagine not eating for a whole day," said Chouhi, concerned for her big sister too. It just wasn't like Ryuubi to refuse a meal prepared by Nagata or Kochu.

"If she's so worried about her stomach, even though she claims she's not sick..." started Bacho.

Batai interjected, "Could she be pregnant?"

Immediately, everyone at the dinner table gasped.

Kanu shot out of her seat while Komei's face turned beet red.

"There's no way! There's no way! Aneue can't be pregnant!" Kanu denied vehemently.

Kochu spoke thoughtfully from her own experience, "When I was carrying Riri, there were times when I had terrible cases of morning sickness and didn't want to eat anything."

"Then that means...does that mean...is Aneue...?" Kanu couldn't make a coherent thought or sentence.

Kochu, realizing what she had done, gently tried to calm Kanu down and said, "That doesn't necessarily mean she's pregnant, Aisha."

"Yeah, there has to be another logical explanation," added Nagata helpfully.

"Is Touka-neechan going to have a baby?" Riri asked excitedly.

"If that was true, then who's the father?" Chou'un asked. As soon as she said that, everyone turned their heads and aimed their gazes on the only unmarried man in the room.

Nagata blinked and asked, "...Why are you guys looking at _me_ like that?"

"Don't you have anything to say, Nagata?" Iori asked accusingly.

"Iori, you're scaring me," Nagata shuddered as Iori glared at him.

"Well, Touka did say she wanted to have your children, so it only makes sense that-"

"You think I'm the father!?" Nagata yelled as he slammed his hands on the table and stood up. "NO WAY! IT'S NOT ME! YOU GOT THE WRONG GUY!"

"Well, it's not me. I would _never_ be unfaithful to Shion," Iori defended. "And who else does Touka have her eyes on but you?"

"Come on! There has to be a good explanation for this!" Nagata cried.

"Nagata-sama, I think you may need to take responsibility for this," quipped Chou'un.

"Aisha, you believe me, right? There's no way I got Touka pregnant!" Nagata looked to his girlfriend.

"I think we should calm down," said Bacho, being the voice of reason. "Maybe Touka's pregnant, maybe she has a bad stomachache, we can't know for sure. So we can't accuse Nagata-sama of doing something like that."

"Thanks, Sui."

"But if you did get Touka pregnant, you have to be a man and take responsibility. My father taught me that a man who leaves a pregnant woman to fend for herself is the worst kind of scum."

"Trust me; I didn't get Touka pregnant. We haven't even done _that_ ," said Nagata.

"Done what?" Riri and Chouhi asked in unison.

"I'll explain when you're older," Nagata and Iori answered simultaneously.

In the end, they found out that Ryuubi wasn't pregnant. She just got a stomachache from eating some spoiled menma after starving herself with her new diet. She admitted that she just wanted to lose some weight.

Although, when told that everyone thought she might be pregnant and Nagata was the father, she seemed oddly thoughtful. Was she wondering what it would be like to have Nagata's baby?

Who knows?

* **Idea from Bloodyredrose1994, based on Shin Koihime Musou Otome Tairan**


	22. The One with the Ostrich

" **THE ONE WITH THE OSTRICH"**

"We're lost!"

"We're not lost!"

"Alright, then where are we?"

"Not where we're going, that's for sure!"

"Well, that clears it up! We're lost!"

Kayu watched with a bored expression as her two traveling buddies, Hideyoshi and Kenshin, argued back and forth. Kenshin, who was holding the map, insisted they weren't lost. Hideyoshi claimed otherwise.

They weren't going anywhere if these two kept arguing.

Kayu lost patience and yelled, "You two, stop arguing! Gridon, you help me set up camp! It's already getting dark! Kurokage, you try to figure out where the hell we are!"

Kayu dragged Hideyoshi away.

"Make sure there are no monkeys!" Kenshin yelled. He looked at the map while mumbling, "Damn monkey. Furry freaks with hands for feet. Unnatural."

He lowered his map and saw a couple of girls taking the path. They were pretty cute looking and he smiled.

Maybe he did need to ask for directions, but he would have to do it without sounding desperate. He pocketed the map after folding it, half of it sticking out of his pocket as he approached the ladies.

"Hello, ladies," he greeted, trying to be suave. "Mind helping a guy out? I think I'm a little lost, so could you tell me how to get to the closest town?"

He reached for the map but found his pocket empty. "The hell?" That was when he turned and found himself looking straight at an ostrich who was looking back at him.

It was also holding his map in its beak.

"My map!" Kenshin shouted.

The ostrich suddenly took off with the map.

"Hey! Get back here!" Kenshin yelled as he chased after the ostrich. It didn't manage to get far as he caught up to it, leaped on its back, and grabbed its neck.

"Give it up! I said give it up! Spit it out!" Kenshin demanded loudly as he tried to wring the ostrich's neck, but it was a lot tougher than he thought. He reached for the map while holding tight as the ostrich tried to shake him off. The ostrich finally managed to throw him, tossing him on his ass before it fled. Kenshin could do nothing but sit in the dirt and watch as the ostrich disappeared into the distance.

Kenshin screamed at the fleeing ostrich, "Damn you, big bird! When I find you again, I'm going to cook you up like fried chicken and have you for dinner! Do you hear me!?" Of course, the ostrich had already run too far to hear him and he could only mutter in frustration, "They're so not going to believe this."

At that moment, Hideyoshi and Kayu showed up again.

"There you are," Kayu said.

"We just set up camp nearby. Hey, where's the map?" Hideyoshi said.

"An ostrich took it!" Kenshin claimed.

He was right.

Neither of them believed him to this day.

 _ ***In Gkoh's "Hunt of the Armored War Gods" story, Kenshin claimed an ostrich stole their map. This is how I pictured it happening.**_


	23. Welcome to Hell

" **WELCOME TO HELL"**

"Where are we?" Maga wondered as he looked at his surroundings. It was a dark wasteland with fire. Lots and lots of fire.

"Maga-kun?" Sorisa asked as she found her husband.

"Sorisa-chan! You're here!"

"And you're alive!"

"Guess again, morons," snarked Moriya as he approached with Kademu.

"We're in Hell," Kademu said as he pointed at the demons torturing their fellow defeated Rinrinshi. "We're _definitely_ in Hell."

"So that means we're dead?" Sorisa asked fearfully. " _Again?_ "

"Eyup," Kademu confirmed. "And this time we're not coming back to life."

"Well, as long as Maga-kun is with me, I can deal with it," said Sorisa confidently.

"And as long as Sorisa-chan is with me, I can handle anything," added Maga.

"Ugh, even in Hell you both make me sick," gagged Moriya.


	24. The Dungeon

**"THE (XXX) DUNGEON"**

"Wait, we have a dungeon? Since when?" Nagata asked.

"Since forever. This castle used to be a fortress. Prisoners of war were locked right under this castle," Komei informed him.

"Man, I guess I should check it out. It must be filthy right now."

Nagata and Komei went to check the dungeon and found the door locked.

"Try the key," Komei suggested.

"OK."

Nagata unlocked the door and he opened it. The two of them went down the stairs and Nagata noticed something.

"Wait, does it smell like flowers in here to you?" Nagata asked, finding it odd.

"You're right, Nagata-sama," Komei agreed.

They went further down.

Well, they found a dungeon, only not the kind of dungeon either of them expected.

Iori was in the middle of the dungeon, his arms above his head and held by chains. He was shirtless and wearing only his pants.

But what really shocked them was the sight of Kochu. She was dressed in black panties, a corset, thigh high stockings, and was wearing high stiletto heel shoes. She also wore black elbow-length gloves and was wearing a mask.

Holding a lit candle, she dripped the wax all over her husband's bare chest.

"Oh, yes~!" Iori moaned.

Kochu grabbed him by the back of his head and ordered, "Call me 'Mistress'."

"Yes, Mistress!" cried Iori and they both shared a deep, passionate and rough kiss. Kochu picked up a whip and lashed Iori, causing him to cry out. "Yes, Mistress! Punish me!"

"You're dirty! A dirty boy!" She whipped his ass. "Dirty boys get punished."

"Yes, I'm a dirty boy! Make me your bitch, Mistress!"

"Yes, you're my bitch and the bitch does as his Mistress tells him!"

The two continued their S&M roleplay, unaware that they had an audience.

"We should go." Nagata hastily backed away as Komei stood frozen, transfixed by the sight. Nagata went back and grabbed her. "Come on!"

The two left just as Kochu was starting to bite on Iori's nipples.

"Let's never speak of this again," Nagata said to Komei.

Komei silently agreed.

Neither Komei nor Nagata could look Kochu and Iori in the eye for an entire week after that.


	25. The Whistle

**"THE WHISTLE"**

"What have you got there, Masataka-kun?" Sonken asked.

"It's a whistle Minmei gave me. She told me to blow on it if I ever need her," Masataka answered.

"Does it work?" Sonken asked.

Masataka blew the whistle and Shuutai appeared out of nowhere.

"You called, Zangetsu-sama?"

"Shuutai, you were following us again, weren't you?" Masataka asked.

"Well, it's my job, Zangetsu-sama."

Masataka patted her head.

"Good girl."

Shuutai purred happily at the praise.


	26. TLC

**"TLC"**

Nagata pressed his forehead against Ryuubi to feel her temperature.

"Yeah, you've got a fever alright and from what I can tell you've got a cold too," Nagata confirmed.

"This is the worst," Ryuubi complained.

"Tell me about it. It's fine if you want a day off, but it sucks if you're too sick to enjoy it. Here, I made you chicken soup."

"I wish I could smell it, but my nose is all clogged up," Ryuubi said sadly. "I bet it tastes wonderful."

"Oh, it does. Best thing to have when you have a cold. Now, open wide."

Ryuubi blushed.

"You'll be feeding me, Nagata-sama?"

"You need to rest so I'll be taking care of you. Now, open up and let me feed you."

Ryuubi eagerly allowed Nagata to feed her.

Karasu spied on them and planned to get sick so Nagata would look after her.


	27. Kanu's Lunch

**"KANU'S LUNCH"**

"Nagata-sama, I made you lunch!" Kanu proclaimed.

"Thank you, Aisha."

 _'Aisha sure looks cute in that apron. But still...CAN THAT STILL BE CONSIDERED FRIED RICE!? How is the rice burnt on only one side!? And is that a chicken leg and fish head sticking out!? OK, I should let her down easy. Shouldn't be too hard.'_

Kanu smiled expectantly at him.

 _'Damn it! I can't say no to her! OK, just eat it fast! Maybe it's not as bad as it looks!'_

"Itadakimasu!"

 _'OH GOD! I WAS WRONG! IT'S WAY WORSE THAN IT LOOKS! OK, DON'T VOMIT! DON'T VOMIT! JUST SWALLOW! SWALLOW!'_

"How is it, Nagata-sama?"

"It's...it's so good...I'm speechless," Nagata lied.

 _'Mental Note: Get Shion to teach her how to cook!'_


	28. Nutcracker

**"NUTCRACKER"**

BG-Nagata had Ryuubi pinned down.

" **Now, Ryuubi. Allow me to show you what a real man can do.** "

Ryuubi looked down and saw that her knee was lined up. She locked eyes with BG-Nagata's.

"I'm sorry."

" **What are you apologizing for-FUCK?!** "

Ryuubi had driven her knee straight into his groin.

BG-Nagata rolled off Ryuubi and put his hands on his injured groin, groaning in pain. Ryuubi got up and left the circle.

"Sorry, Nagata-sama."


	29. Sekito the Wonder Dog

**"SEKITO THE WONDER DOG"**

"Please, don't do this," Ryuubi begged.

" **Keep begging. I like it when they beg** ," BG-Nagata smiled and licked her cheek. " **You taste** _ **good.**_ "

Sekito barked loudly and leaped into the circle. He jumped and bit BG-Nagata right in the crotch.

" **AAAARRRGGGGGHHHHH!** " BG-Nagata screamed as he released Ryuubi. " **GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!** " Sekito had a really good grip on his balls. " **AAAARRRRGGGGGHHH! THIS IS THE WORST PAIN EVER! NOTHING CAN COMPARE TO THIS KIND OF PAIN!** "

Ryofu stepped into the circle and punched BG-Nagata in the face, knocking him to the floor.

" **Ow! My face!** "

Sekito released BG-Nagata's crotch and padded over to Ryofu. Ryofu picked up her dog and smiled.

"Good boy."

" **The pain...all I know is pain...** " BG-Nagata whimpered pathetically on the floor.


	30. Vomit War

**"VOMIT WAR"**

BG-Nagata finished spewing all over Hideyoshi and smiled.

Hideyoshi wiped the stuff off his glasses, glared at BG-Nagata...and vomited right back in his face.

Iori looked ill and turned his head, accidentally barfing in Karasu's face.

Disgusted, Karasu threw up all over Iori.

And then they blew chunks all over each other.

Kaku walked into the room, saw the mess and deadpanned, "I'm not cleaning this up."


	31. Golden Shower

**"GOLDEN SHOWER"**

BG-Nagata laughed as he drove another person away with his words. He might be tied up, but that didn't mean he had to stop having fun. As he threw his head back and laughed louder, his chair tilted backward. He fell flat on the floor with the chair.

" **Damn!** " BG-Nagata cursed as he tried to get back up. " **Damn it! I can't get up! Hey! Hey! Can someone come in here and help me back up!? Hey!** "

Ryofu walked into the binding circle and looked down at BG-Nagata's helpless state.

" **OK, you. Help me back up** ," BG-Nagata ordered.

Ryofu stared emotionlessly at BG-Nagata and whistled.

A pack of dogs soon ran right into the room and gathered around BG-Nagata. He did not like the look of this.

" **What...what is this...? What are you doing?** "

The dogs sniffed BG-Nagata then turned so their butts were facing him. BG-Nagata watched as each of the dogs raised a hind leg. His eyes widened as he realized what they were about to do.

" **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!** "


	32. Welcome to Hell Neasel

**WELCOME TO HELL, NEASEL**

"Ugh..." Nise groaned. "Where am I?"

"Welcome to Hell, you weasel-faced bastard," Horse-Face glowered at him.

"Enjoy your stay. You're going to be here for eternity," added Ox-Head with a sadistic grin.

"What!?" Nise cried as he backed away from the two underworld guardians. "I can't be in Hell! I have so much to do!"

"Now you have much to do here!" Ox-Head picked Nise up.

"Let me go! Let me go! Unhand me!" yelled Nise as he struggled in his captor's grip.

"Don't forget this," Horse-Face hung a wooden board on Nise's neck.

"What is this?" Nise demanded.

"Your new name, 'Neasel'," Horse-Face grinned.

"What!?" the newly dubbed Neasel gasped.

"Now, enjoy your new home," Horse-Face grinned sadistically as he pointed at a pit. Ox-Head threw Neasel inside the pit.

"And don't worry! We made sure you had company!" Ox-Head yelled down the hole.

"Wait, are those tentacles!? Get away! Get away! GET AWAAAAAYYYYY!" Neasel shrieked like a little girl.

"What a weasel," scoffed Horse-Face.

"Don't you mean 'Neasel'?" Ox-Head joked.

"Hah! Good one!" Horse-Head laughed.


	33. Brusa Li's Wisdom 2

**BRUSA LI'S WISDOM #2**

"I must go help my friends! They need me!" exclaimed Kanu as she was about to head into battle.

"YOUNG WARRIOR!" Brusa Li called out, stopping Kanu. "Wait! Before you go into battle, allow me to offer you words of wisdom and advice! _When the dog pees on your carpet, the food in the kitchen will be spoiled._ "

There was a moment of awkward silent as Kanu attempted to process Brusa Li's words.

"...Forgive me, elder, but are you lost? Do you need me to help you find your family?" Kanu asked, concerned for the strange, senile old man.

"Kanu-dono, have you seen-!" Kada suddenly stopped as he found Brusa Li. "Brusa-sennin, there you are! I've been looking everywhere for you!"

"Is he your friend, Kada-sensei?" Kanu asked.

"There you are!" Brusa Li snapped at Kada. "Now, where's my soup!?"

Kada sighed and took Brusa Li's hand.

"Unfortunately yes. Come on, Brusa-sennin."

Kanu watched them go before she headed into battle.

"Remember, young warrior! _Before you shoot an arrow, make sure the dogs' tails are wagging in the air!_ " Brusa Li shouted.

Kada sighed again.

"You need to stay off the herbs, Brusa-sennin."


	34. Do the Thing

**"DO THE THING"**

Karasu and Nagata were in the middle of a forest clearing, surrounded by a gang of bandits.

"Alright, hand over all your valuables, and we'll let you go," a bandit demanded.

"Kara-chan," Nagata addressed his cousin.

"Do the thing?" she asked as she started to draw her sword.

"Do the thing," Nagata confirmed.

Karasu's lips instantly spread into a cruel smile.

Like a whirlwind of death, Karasu brutally tore the bandits apart. They screamed as blood, guts and limbs spilled on the ground.

As a head rolled by, Karasu sheathed her sword and sighed. Suddenly, she blushed as she felt Nagata cup her chin and raise her face.

"Kara-chan, you got some on your face," Nagata said as he gently wiped away the blood on her face with a handkerchief. "There, all better. Now, come on. We should be able to reach the next town before sundown if we stay on this path."

Karasu felt her cheeks heat up and smiled as she happily followed her cousin out of the forest.


	35. Marty Stu

**"MARTY STU"**

Nagata was directing a school play when he was approached by Iori and Hideyoshi.

"Nagata, there's something we need to ask you," said Iori.

"Yes, what is it?" Nagata asked.

"It's about the script," Iori started. "How do I put this delicately...?"

"It's garbage," Hideyoshi concluded.

"Yes, it's garbage."

"Garbage!?" Nagata exclaimed. "But I wrote it!"

"Well that explains it," Hideyoshi remarked.

Nagata narrowed his eyes at Hideyoshi.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

"Well, it's the protagonist. He's like an idealized version of you. He's _too_ perfect."

"Too perfect? I gave him flaws!"

"Well, these 'flaws' were added in so you can milk sympathy from the audience." Hideyoshi flipped through the pages as he continued, "I mean, it just says how his childhood sucked when his parents died, but he got amnesia, and was adopted by his aunt and uncle. Besides that black spot in his life, the rest of his life is just all nice and dandy. What do you call that?"

"A 'Marty Stu'," Iori supplied.

"Yes, a 'Marty Stu'!"

Nagata squared his jaw and growled, "You are ruining my vision!"

"Nagata, I'm your friend, but this play seems like blatant wish-fulfilment. You're the hero, you get all the princesses, and in the end there's a huge love scene," Iori argued.

"Sounds like you're overcompensating," Hideyoshi remarked.

Nagata turned away and stormed off with a huff.

"Sheesh, can't take criticism, can he?" Hideyoshi asked Iori.

"No, he cannot," Iori confessed.


	36. Abridged Parodies

**"ABRIDGED PARODY #1"**

On the first episode when Nagata transforms on purpose:

 **[ORANGE ARMS! HANAMICHI ON STAGE!]**

"Wow! Amazing! I now have the armor and powers of my favorite character! Just like I've always wanted! Now, even if I am just a normal guy in a suit of fictional armor, I know I will be victorious because I believe! Also, this is obviously wish-fulfilment, so there's no way I can lose! I AM THE SPECIAL SNOWFLAKE!"

And so Nagata defeats his first monster. He later gains the love of multiple strong warrior women.

And they banged.

The End.

* * *

 **"ABRIDGED PARODY #2"**

When Not-Baron meets Not-Gaim.

"Let us duel, Oda! Let us show who is stronger!"

"I will defeat you, Akechi!"

"No you won't! You have the perfect happy family, while I lost my whole family and ended up in the wrong crowd! As the audience is supposed to sympathize with me more, I shall be victorious!"

"Damn, you might be right! But I'm the main character! I should win by default!"

"Well, I am fighting for my ruler who I won't let give me orders but I follow her orders anyway because she looks like my dead sister!"

"Then we shall see who will win! Let us furiously scream each other's names at the top of our lungs! AKECHI!"

"ODA!"

* * *

 **"ABRIDGED PARODY #3"**

"Oh, yeah! A tournament arc! This is going to be fun!" Nagata exclaimed.

"Why? What's the point?" Iori asked.

"Well, duh! Because every shonen manga and anime has a tournament arc! We're just doing the same thing!"

"Not so well, it seems!"

"Hey, Oda! You and I will fight!" Mitsuki challenged.

"Hell, yeah!" agreed Nagata.

"And we will too!" Haru said.

"Sorry, but totally forgettable _tools_ like you don't have a say," Mitsuki reminded Haru, Kenshin, Hideyoshi, and Marcus.

* * *

 **ABRIDGED PARODY #4**

"And do you deserve this power?" Chosen asked.

"Hell yeah! I'm the main character! People are supposed to follow my story and see how great I am while sympathizing with me when I whine in grief!" Nagata answered.

"Then go ahead! Grab that power and become stronger physically but not mentally or emotionally!"

"I'm not going to bother improving my character since I'll be super powerful!"

* * *

 **"ABRIDGED PARODY #5"**

Kochu asked, "So, your parents didn't love you?"

Iori nodded sadly, "No, they didn't."

Kochu smiled and flashed her breasts.

"Let me be your _mommy_ , baby."

* * *

 **"ABRIDGED PARODY #6"**

"I'm sorry, Mom. I have to go save the world in the past. I also have to go so I don't get trapped in lame mediocrity despite having a loving family," Nagata said to Yang.

"That's alright. You're not my real son anyway. I just adopted you since my sister died and you needed a family," said Yang.

"Sorry I have to go."

"It's OK. You're a teenager. Now I'm going to get on my cool bike and ride freely. NO MORE RESPONSIBILITIES!"

"I LOVE YOU, MOM!"

"I LOVE YOU TOO, BUT I DON'T CARE!"


	37. Boy Band

" **Boy Band"**

Hideyoshi, Kenshin, and Sasuke were gathered in Kosonsan's courtyard. They were dressed in flashy outfits at Kenshin's insistence.

"And so are you guys clear on the plan?" Kenshin questioned.

"You want us to form a boy band so you can pick up bitches," Hideyoshi answered with a touch of uncertainty.

"Yeah, ain't that a great plan?" Kenshin grinned.

"I would refrain from calling them 'bitches'," Sasuke opined.

"Is 'chicks' or 'babes' fine?" Kenshin asked.

"Those should be OK."

"Anyway, this will work, bud. I saw your performance at Shoku's Harvest Festival and you guys were killing it! The babes were all going nuts!"

"I'm happily in a relationship," stated Hideyoshi.

"Fine, more girls for me. And you, Sasuke?"

"I'm single," Sasuke answered.

Kenshin nodded. That meant sharing fangirls, but he was willing to compromise.

"OK, now that we're set, we need to have roles. Hideyoshi, you're the smart one," said Kenshin.

Hideyoshi adjusted his glasses and smiled proudly.

"Naturally."

Kenshin pointed at Sasuke.

"Sasuke, you'll be the mysterious one."

Sasuke cocked an eyebrow.

"How am I the mysterious one?"

"You just have that kind of look."

"And what about you?" Hideyoshi asked Kenshin.

"I'm the manly one!" Kenshin claimed putting his hands on his hips.

"That's debatable," Hideyoshi deadpanned.

"Whatever! I'm claiming it!" Kenshin declared proudly. "OK, let's start rehearsing and then we can be famous and be surrounded by babes!"

They rehearsed and before long put on their first show. They did great, surprisingly.

It was only when Sasuke started playing his flute as part of their routine that things quickly went South.

Sasuke, Hideyoshi, and Kenshin screamed as they were chased by crazed fangirls.

"I wanted to be chased by girls, but not like this!" Kenshin cried.

"Help! Somebody, get the guards! HELP MEEEEE!" Hideyoshi shrieked.

"Sasuke, what the fuck did you do!?" Kenshin demanded accusingly.

"I just played my flute! I didn't think it would be this effective!" Sasuke yelled back.

The three of them ran from their fangirls, hoping to outrun them and get to safety.

This would be the first and last time they ever performed as a boy band.

"THEY'RE TAKING MY PANTS!" Hideyoshi shrieked.


	38. Death by Snu-Snu

" **Death...BY SNU-SNU!"**

Hideyoshi, Kenshin, and Haru were tied to wooden posts. Assembled before them was a large group of female barbarians. The barbarians were scantily clad in animal skins, displaying a lot of flesh. Some girls were slender, some were muscular, and some looked like supermodels.

"How did we end up here?" Kenshin wondered out loud. When he came to, he found himself chained to the wall.

"You got drunk and you said some things that offended our hosts," Hideyoshi reminded. " _Sexist_ things."

"Look, buddy. I can't be held responsible for every little thing I say when I'm drunk," Kenshin defended. "Really, my mouth has a mind of its own."

"That's your excuse for everything!"

"Guys, the Queen's here, and she does not look happy," Haru informed them.

The Queen of the Female Barbarians was very beautiful, with olive skin. Like the rest of her tribe, she was scantily clad. She wore a furry bikini with a necklace made of sharp teeth and she also had scars on her arms and legs. She wore a headdress made of large and colorful feathers and a cape that was made from the skin of a tiger.

"My tribe! These men have been found guilty of disrespecting us and our way of life!" the queen announced. "They must be punished."

Hideyoshi did not want to die, so he tried his best to explain away what happened.

"Excuse me, Your Majesty. This is just a very silly misunderstand. My friend cannot keep his mouth shut when he's drunk so if you could just let us go-"

"SILENCE!"

"Ah! Yes, ma'am!"

The Barbarian Queen continued.

"As it is our custom, the men will be punished by providing us with something of value. They will give us their seed so we may give birth to a new generation!"

The female barbarians cheered as the three men caught the queen's meaning.

"Wait, what did she say?" Kenshin asked Hideyoshi. "Did she just said what I think she just said."

"I'm afraid so, Kenshin," Hideyoshi answered.

"We're their stud horses," Haru gulped.

"DEATH...BY MATING!" the queen roared.

The barbarians females cheered.

"Now, the one known as Hiyoshi will mate with the big women!" the queen declared and Hideyoshi saw the big women. They were the women who were muscular but not at all unattractive. They had large breasts too. Still, they could break his spine with a hug.

He gulped.

The queen continued.

"Next, the one known as Kenshin will mate with the petite women!"

The queen was referring to the slender members of her tribe. They may not have very large breasts, but they were pretty cute in Kenshin's eyes.

The Queen concluded.

"And finally, Haru, who is deemed the most attractive of the men will mate with the most _beautiful_ women in our tribe." The queen gave Haru a sultry look and a wink. He grinned back nervously. "Then the big women! Then the petite women! Then the big women again! And finally back to the beautiful women!"

"Excuse me, but I have a girlfriend!" Hideyoshi protested.

"And I'm married!" Haru added.

"Dudes, I don't think they care. Also, I don't think Yue and Ensho will mind so much," Kenshin told him.

"Kenshin, we are going to _die_!" Hideyoshi cried out.

"And you don't know my wife. She claimed my dick since day one," Haru added.

"Yeah, but what a way to go. You know, I've once dreamed of dying while having sex with a bunch of beautiful women. Now that dream is going to come true!" Kenshin smiled.

"You seriously dreamt about dying in the middle of sex?" Haru questioned.

"Dude, I'm a guy. I've always hoped I could die while having sex with a hot babe," Kenshin replied with a smooth grin.

"I don't think I'll survive long enough to enjoy anything!" Hideyoshi yelled in horror. The big women were going to ride him until his pelvis was crushed. He was not made for something like that.

"I sure hope we survive this," said Haru solemnly. "If we don't, I want to say that it's been an honor knowing you."

"Thanks, man. You too," Kenshin returned.

"I was talking to Hideyoshi."

"NOW, LET THE MATING BEGIN!" the queen commanded.

"WOOOHOOOOO! THIS IS A GOOD DAY TO DIE!" Kenshin howled joyfully.

"Kenshin, I swear, if we die here, when we get reincarnated I'm gonna hunt you down and kill you myself!" Hideyoshi vowed furiously.

"I REGRET NOTHING!"

Eventually, Ensho and Kosonsan found them. The three boys had to rest in bed for weeks to recover from their ordeal.

"Worth it!"

"Shut up, Kenshin!"


	39. The 3 Nuts

" **The Three Nuts"**

Kenshin, Hideyoshi, and Haru needed money to fix up their van. Luckily for them, there was a wrestling tournament taking place. Unfortunately, it was a tag-team tournament. Haru was capable of wrestling, which left either Hideyoshi or Kenshin to be his partner.

So, the two best friends did the only thing to decide who would be Haru's tag-team partner.

"Rock, Paper Scissors!" Hideyoshi and Kenshin threw their hands forward.

"Scissors cuts paper!" Kenshin grinned.

"Dammit..." Hideyoshi grumbled.

"Relax, buddy. Haru'll do all the wrestling anyway. I guarantee you won't even have to tag in," Kenshin reassured him.

Hideyoshi gulped. Knowing their luck, Hideyoshi might get killed. He should prepare a will just in case.

Haru and Hideyoshi entered the wrestling tournament. Haru wore a pair of black trunks while Hideyoshi wore his gym clothes. He did not look like a wrestler, but he still stood at his corner of the ring to watch as Haru decimated the opposition.

Kenshin sat with the audience, eating nachos.

Hideyoshi glared at his best friend, swearing under his breath as his friend comfortably ate nachos.

"If I die, I'm haunting you."

Hideyoshi knew Haru was strong, but there was a chance he would have to tag in. He was not much of a wrestler.

* * *

Punisher Pete was a large and muscular man with a bald head and a beard. He had tattoos all over his body. He also wore trunks that did not hide his legs. In fact, he proudly displayed all of his muscles.

He was also 8 feet tall and 280 pounds of pure mean. He demonstrated how tough he was by biting a steel bar in half.

Hideyoshi almost peed himself at the sight of Punisher Pete.

* * *

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"

Punisher Pete chased Hideyoshi who screamed as he ran around the ring.

"You're doing great, buddy! Keep doing that! You'll eventually tire him out!" Kenshin encouraged.

"I'm going to kill you, Kenshin! Aaaahhhhhhhhh!" Hideyoshi shouted.

Hideyoshi screamed like a little girl as Punisher Pete chased him around the ring. He managed to grab hold of the poor bespectacled boy.

"You're going to fly in style, boy," Punisher Pete grinned before he tossed Hideyoshi out of the ring.

Hideyoshi landed on top of Kenshin, causing his nachos to go flying. They landed all over the place.

"Kenshin..."

"Motherfucker ruined my nachos," Kenshin growled as he stood up and put Hideyoshi in his seat. "Excuse me."

Kenshin climbed into the ring, ignoring the referee, and confronted Pete.

"What do you want?" Pete asked, trying to intimidate Kenshin.

"You made me drop my nachos," Kenshin said in an even tone.

"Yeah?"

"Nobody makes me drop my nachos."

Kenshin's leg flew up and hit Pete right in the balls. The muscular man let out a high-pitch squeal as he grasped his gonads in pain. Kenshin then grabbed him by the nose and pinched, pulling him around the ring as he continued squealing.

"Argh! Lemme go! Let go of my nose!"

"Squeal, piggy! Squeal!"

The audience loved it and laughed. They thought it was part of the show.

Haru blinked, barely believing what he was seeing.

Then Kenshin climbed onto Pete's back and started biting his ear.

"GET HIM OFF! GET THIS PSYCHO OFF! I GIVE UP! I FORFEIT! YOU WIN! YOU WIN!"


End file.
